Beautifully Broken
by xSugarBearx
Summary: I completely Fudge at Summaries lol. So just read it. It was originally a oneshot but I changed it :D
1. Chapter 1

**Eesh. Long time no see. I'm now working 3 things (Although this ones a bit different) to clear a bit more of my horrendous blockage. Any way :D 'Tis a song fic to the song 'Broken' by seether and Evanescence :D **

**D/C – (Just so i dont get sued hehe) I Dont own any of this and I most probably never will unless I rape them both until they give it to me :D Which i wouldnt mind lol)**

...

_**I wanted you to know that I love the way you laugh  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away  
I keep your photograph; And I know it serves me well  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain **_

"_I Don't care, Howard, you northern weirdo, I AM NOT wearing THAT on stage, or ever!"_

"_Why not?"_

_Vince looked at the beige pants and brown shirt that looked as if it had been thrown up on and visibly shivered. _

"_It's one of the best in my closet!"_

_Howard looked a little hurt as Vince scrutinised the outfit with disgust. _

_Vince's eyes went to Howard again, it wasn't his fault all Vince's clothes had been ruined by a very high shaman and a certain Gorilla wielding a spell book. His face broke into a grin before he knew what he was doing and he began to shake with silent laughter, which eventually turned loud. He didn't want to laugh, he wanted to cry his big blue eyes out for the sake of his ruined wardrobe._

"_Oh God. Naboo! I think Vince's screws have come loose!"_

_Naboo wandered in as Vince caught his breath, but this only started him off again._

"_We're on in 2 hours, all the clothes he's got are his pyjamas and he's laughing like a moron. What did you do?"_

"_I didn't do anything Howard, you ball bag"_

...

Howard remembered the day Vince had all his clothes burned away by the blundering Bollo and tiny Shaman. He didn't think he'd ever seen Vince laugh so much. He smiled at the memory. A slight tug at the corners of his mouth as he stared at the smashed photograph in front of him, he and Vince were at a concert, he had his eyes closed with his face being pulled in the direction of Vince's, Vince, obviously drunk out of his brains, was pulling Howard's face to rest against his own which was nestled in between his shoulder and neck. Vince's other hand was holding up a CD, Howard couldn't remember what it was and the crack in the glass ran directly through it. His emotions rapidly changed as he picked up the photograph and his head began to swim with thoughts of Vince's hair, his eyes, Vince laughing...he threw the photo again, towards the wall furthest from him, and it landed with a soft thud on Vince's bed. It didn't help. Vince's grinning face flooded his mind again, he threw himself onto the carpet and began to sob as if it was what he was made to do.

He was beginning to think it was.

Eventually the tears stopped falling.

Howard pulled himself slowly to is feet and surveyed the mess around him. The clock was in bits on the floor by the table it once occupied, CDs and Jazz records lay broken at his feet, Vince's mattress had been overturned, there was make up on the walls and on his clothes, his hands were covered in it, mixing with drying blood, sweat and tears.

...


	2. Numbah too

**Woah! Yeah I like to boogie...**

**:D**

**Chuffed, as ever, with Reviews lol**

**xxx**

**D/C Just so I don't Get sued. I DON'T own them (Wish I did) :D**

**Love THEM the sex beasts.**

...

_**cause I'm broken when I'm open  
And I don't feel like I am strong enough  
'cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome  
And I don't feel light when you're gone away **_

Vince wandered around the empty house. His thoughts resting on one subject. Howard.

He remembered when they were still friends. Crimping about everything and nothing. Working in the zoo. Sleeping on the cold hard floor. Working in the shop...that's when things between them changed. He knew it was his fault, it always was really. He thought about the day it ended. The day HE ruined what they had.

...

"_Vince?"_

"_Yeah Howard?"_

_Vince slowly climbed out of his bed and shuffled over to the lights. With a soft click a bright yellow light flooded the room and made Vince's eyes blink rapidly. As he made his way over to Howard's bed and its ill looking occupant._

"_You alright Howard? You look even worse than usual,"_

"_I don't feel well. What did you give me to drink Vince?"_

_It was nearing the morning after the night before and the hangover seemed to be settling itself nicely with Howard. Vince never seemed to get hangovers, his bubbly brightness seemed to ward them off. _

"_All you had was a bit of whisky Howard you lightweight!"_

_Vince laughed a little at Howard's expense and he earned the most powerful look Howard could muster wrapped in a duvet feeling like his body was protesting to the mere task of breathing. _

"_It's not funny you tit, whose gonna run the shop tomorrow?"_

"_Why can't I? I'm a better shopkeeper than you, Naboo says it all the time,"_

_Vince looked extremely proud of himself but Howard seemed to be a little doubtful._

"_You couldn't look after a pet rock for the day, Vince,"_

_Vince looked a little hurt at that. _

"_What about the zoo? I looked after the animals there didn't I?"_

"_Not on your own you didn't,"_

_Vince huffed for a bit longer but Howard won and told Vince he'd tell Naboo to close the shop tomorrow or something as Howard didn't feel up to it and Vince couldn't be trusted with it on his own._

_About two hours later, Vince gave up tossing and turning in his bed and decided to make some tea. He didn't really know why because he didn't like making tea and being in the cramped little space. He plodded into the kitchen, dressed in his favourite blue pyjamas, they had little sequinned patterns and animals on them although there weren't many left as Vince liked to fidget and he'd pulled most of them off. His tiny brain cell struggled to remember how to make tea. Teabag first? He didn't suppose it really mattered because it was going to mix together anyway. He smiled as he spooned in 4 sugars and a bit of milk; he flicked the radio on and began to dance around the kitchen, making sure not to knock anything down as everyone else was still in bed. _

"_What you doin' up so early, little man?" _

_Howard had dragged himself into the kitchen._

"_Making tea,"_

_Vince beamed like the sun and held up the cup as Howard looked on, obviously shocked._

"_Well, since you're a tea making whiz kid why don't you make me one?"_

_Vince grinned again, delighted at the compliment (Or sarcasm) directed at him._

_He turned, just for a moment, and looked at Howard, his hair was more ruffled than usual, his ancient brown dressing gown reaching only his knees was bobbled and worn in places, but Howard was under the dillusion that they set off his smoky brown hair and chocolate eyes, which, Vince thought, on some level it did, but a less deep colour would look so much better, Vince toyed with this image for a while. The woman in his brain changing colours and hairstyles on the image of Howard in his dressing gown. Suddenly he had the most genius idea that had ever hit him (Aside from the mirrorball suit) and he bounded into the living room like a particularly happy little bunny; He set the cup down and jumped onto the sofa next to Howard._

"_Howard? Can I go shopping for you and give you a make over?"_

_He grinned expectantly and his face seemed to drop when Howard shook his head._

"_Why not? I'm good at clothes!"_

"_Vince, you look like a futuristic prostitute at the best of times, why would I, Howard moon, man of action, M__averick extraordinaire__ , want to look like you, Vince Noir, Electro Poof?"_

"_Man of action? Maverick Extra-Extror-Whatever. Youre about as effective as a snorkel on the moon, Howard. And your fashion sense is horrible."_

_Howard felt like crying. He didn't know if it was his hangover (His first), the fact that he'd had little sleep in the past few days. Whatever it had triggered from, Vince's words had tipped him over the edge and he snapped. He didn't say anything, just poured the now lukewarm tea over Vince's slightly tousled head and walked back to the bedroom before locking the door and slumping onto his bed._

_Vince was thoroughly stunned. Howard had never reacted like that before. Had he gone a little too far?_

_He paused for a moment and then tiptoed slowly to their bedroom._

"_Howard?" He couldn't hear anything from the other side of the door so he tapped on the door. _

"_I'm Sorry Howard I didn't mean it I swear. I..."_

_He didn't finish his sentence. Instead, his eyes clouded and he choked on tears that were quickly forcing their way out. He sat by the door shaking with quiet sobs until he felt strong hands pull him up and the soft scent of jazz and bookmarks and everything that makes Howard Moon invade his nostrils, making him aware of hands on his shoulders and a strange longing to do things to his friend, things he was almost certain would not be well received. The small chance that they wouldn't made Vince wipe at his eyes and look up into Howard's, before he even knew what he was doing he grabbed his face and pulled it down so that their lips brushed. Just testing the water. Howard froze. Had he imagined it or had Vince just done what he thought he had? He decided to make absolutely sure and bowed his lips to Vince's, for longer this time, his fingers grasping at Vince's damp hair and tangling with it as Vince wrapped his arm around Howard's neck and gave him a more firm support. Howard had now pinned Vince up against the wall as his tongue danced with Vince's and his arms moved down to his waist._

_..._

Vince had somehow ended up outside Leroy's house, at the end of the path, in the rain. His hair had become a soggy mess but he didn't even care any more. His world had been pulled out from underneath him like a loose carpet and he's falling. His heart hurt and his whole body ached for something he knew he couldn't ever have near him again. Howard. His mind couldn't seem to push him out and he wasn't sure he wanted to. He felt like the rain when there isn't a Rainbow to follow. Felt as heavy as Lead and less alive than it.

...

WAH. :) Love. I'm dedicating this (So far) To the reviewers of Changes and this. Lol Changes WILL be updated ASAP :)

Much love

xxx

way


	3. Noombar three :o

**This chapter is shorter. :) But I don't know if i'm happy with it yet. If I get bad reviews I'll change it**

**D/C - I Don't own them. Well, it's all ye need aint it. XD**

**Happy readin chucks **

_..._

**_The worst is over now and we can breathe again  
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away  
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight  
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain_**

Howard woke. Again. He'd been having the same dream every night since Vince had left. It was always exactly as it was the night before, he'd walked into Leroy's house and found Vince. Dead. He hated being apart from him, not knowing if he was O.K and he missed the banter they always shared in the shop when they served customers...He supposed it had gotten easier within the past few days, he could now look at pictures of him and Vince without breaking into fits of anger and pain; but it still hurt. He would sometimes just stare at the phone, willing Vince or even Leroy to call. Just so he knew how Vince was. But just when he got in into his head that he could forgive Vince for what he had done, something would remind him of what had happened and he would end up in their room again, sobbing into Vince's wardrobe, or his bed, anything that smelled like, looked like or remotely reminded him of Vince he would either cling to or scream at.

...

"_Vince...VINCE?"_

"_...Howard...?" Vince's quiet voice rang through the now silent flat as he grabbed at his clothes. _

"_Vince...Is everything O.k? You sound ...weird..."_

_The footsteps drew closer to the door. Vince's breath caught in his throat as the handle turned and Howard stepped in. It all happened too quickly. Howard's face went almost instantly from concern to passionate anger. He had picked up a book from the shelf and hurled it at the half naked woman cowering in the corner. _

"_Howard, It's not how it looks!"_

"_REALLY VINCE? HOW THE FUCK IS IT THEN?"_

_Vince screwed his face up and fell to the floor as more books hurtled around the room, hitting him in the face, chest, everywhere. It didn't hurt as much as the slicing words Howard was spitting at him. Howard's face shone with tears, the woman had somehow managed to get out past Howard and the door banged shut downstairs. Eventually, after what seemed like a lifetime, CDs and books all over, Vince bruised and bleeding, Howard shaking and sobbing as he tried to make sense of the past fifteen minutes. _

"_Why?"_

_Vince whimpered and began to cry. Howard hated himself for it, but he softened a little when he saw the damage he had done. Vince looked almost as bad as Howard felt and, as he grabbed Vince's arm and thrust a suitcase at him, he felt like half of him was being ripped away. It hurt too much to even think about as he threw Vince's clothes into the suitcase and unceremoniously pushed him out the door._


	4. Numberrrr four laddie!

**Woah. New chapter!! Yay! Not entirely pleased with this...Merh, I hope you people are! **

...

_Why do you do this to me?  
Why do you do this so easily?  
You make it hard to smile because  
You make it hard to breathe  
Why do you do this to me?  
A phrasing that's a single tear,  
Is harder than I ever feared  
And you were left feeling so alone.  
Because these days aren't easy  
Like they have been once before  
These days aren't easy anymore._

10 days. 10 days away from home. Away from Howard. Vince dragged himself from the sofa he was currently occupying at Leroy's house, wrapped himself in the duvet and did what he had become accustomed to do on a morning. Sit on the floor and drink vodka until his mind went numb, while listening to old love songs and sobbing over the photograph of him and Howard on the beach he kept with him. He felt a familiar burning in his stomach as he stared at it, a little like that feeling just before you throw up, he supposed it could be the alcohol, but he knew that that was a lie, he missed Howard with every inch of himself. He thought he saw him sometimes. Outside. Walking by, occasionally casting a 'casual glance' towards Leroy's house, Vince would sometimes kid himself that Howard was outside, looking for him and that all was forgiven. He knew that Howard probably went a different way to Lester Corncrake's house...why would he want to chance seeing Vince? With this thought lingering in his mind and screaming in his ears; he curled himself up into a ball and shook with silent sobs. He didn't hear the front door opening or the voices getting louder as the two speakers entered the living room where Vince was currently gasping for breath and sobbing.

"Vince?"

Vince mumbled something incoherent and attempted to make himself even smaller.

"Vince!"

The second voice seemed more forceful, tinged with concern as Vince seemed to be struggling to breathe.

Vince knew the second voice. The first, he knew was Leroy, and the second was Naboo. Vince confirmed this by turning to face them. His eyes were red and puffy, they had lost their shine, his hair looked greasy and lank, his usually bright, cheery self had been reduced to this almost empty shell, currently shaking and hiccuping with sobs on the floor.

"Hey...'Hic'...Naboo,"

His voice seemed to crack and drag with every syllable.

Naboo whispered into Leroy's ear, who promptly left the room with a sympathizing smile at Vince.

Naboo cautiously made his way over to the sofa and sat down. After about ten minutes Vince composed himself and sat up.

Naboo was looking at Vince, concern shadowing his features for a split second.

"H-How's Howard?" His voice stumbled over his words as if he was choking on them.

"The same as you. He spends most of his time at Lester Corncrake's. He won't eat unless I get Bollo to hold him down while I spoon it in and he hasn't stopped crying in a week," Naboo replied plainly. As if he was reading the news, but Vince died a little more inside with every word that flowed so easily from Naboo's mouth. He couldn't bear how much Howard was obviously going through and he couldn't even tell him how sorry he was.

"When can I come home? I want to come home Naboo I don't like living here, it dosen't feel right I want the shop, I want Howard!" Vince had broken down again, and he was now babbling on the floor by Naboo's feet.

"That's why I came Vince, you ballbag, get off the floor, Howard hasn't said anything, but in his sleep he talks about...things...I took a look through his subconscious and he's worried about you being on your own, I think that he should see you,"

Vince had stopped crying and a faint glimmer had returned to his watery blue eyes as Naboo continued to speak, but all he could hear was "He's worried about you..." His mind dusted itself off and began to whir, either Howard still loved him even the slightest bit...or he just felt guilty about leaving Vince to his own devices...BUT he must've known he'd go to Leroy's, Leroy was the only friend left. They had all ditched him when they found out about Howard but he didn't even care. He glanced up at Naboo and realised that he had stopped talking.

"Well...?"

"Well what?"

Naboo rolled his eyes and muttered something before fixing Vince with a stare and telling him to go and get ready to go home and win Howard back.

**_..._**

**WaOhhhh! :D**

**Weeeeee. **

**You know the little review button won't be there forever...;)**


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